Crying at a Funeral and How to Avoid It

Crying at a Funeral is understandable and If there’s one time when even men are excused if they collapse in a fountain of tears it’s at a funeral.

Anyone can get overwhelmed after the realisation that they will never see their loved one again hits them and hits them hard.

But what if you want to be the tower of strength for those around you. What if you want to postpone the tears until you are behind closed doors?

Well there is a way you can remain dry-eyed even under the most intense provocation. Not every technique will work for everyone. It’s for you to try and find out which method works for you:

Crying at a FuneralBlank your mind to stop crying at a funeral

This technique involves you trying to extract yourself from the heat of emotion around you by detaching your mind from the funeral environment.

You use meditation-like ways of freeing your mind from the emotions that it so yearns to express. Simply close your eyes and take in deep breaths.

Once your breathing patterns are as relaxed as possible, try and imagine yourself in a happier time and place.

Opposite emotion

Try and trick your mind by telling it that you are feeling the opposite of what you’re feeling. Tell yourself that you are happy and at peace while imagining your life a few years down the line when everything has gone back to some semblance of normalcy.


Find a poem, prayer or song that is your cue to automatically calm your nerves. If you are religious you could memorise the words of your favourite hymn.

Inflicting pain

From childhood you probably made up some form of self-inflicted pain to keep you from crying in front of your classmates when you were punished.

You could probably still be using it today to keep from yawning when your boss is giving his speech. For me, like for many, it was biting my lip.

Others give themselves a surreptitious pinch or dig their nails into their palms. The pain theoretically forces you to focus on it rather than the circumstance you are in at present.

A less painful way of distracting yourself is by pushing your tongue hard against the roof of your mouth. You can achieve the same effect by suddenly changing your facial expression or blinking rapidly.

Try to Step away from distraught people crying at a funeral 

Step away from the people around you if they’re sobbing and dabbing at their eyes before you catch the infection of emotion.


If you are not in a position to walk away, try shifting your focus to something else in the room. It could be the patterns on the carpet or the way cups are arranged on the table.

Another way is to have a glass of water and focus on the action of slowly sipping it.

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All info was correct at time of publishing