What To Do Say and Wear at Funerals

August 2, 2015

For many people, going to a funeral or a memorial service is an uncomfortable and embarrassing time. It is because they don’t know how to act, they don’t know what to do say and wear at funerals.

You can alleviate this uncomfortable feeling somewhat if you know all the right things to say and do.

This short guide on what to do say and wear at funerals should help you. A funeral is not a fashion show, so one should be conservative in dress and respectful in manner.

What to Do Say and Wear at Funerals

What to do say and wear at funeralsIf you feel awkward at a funeral, there is help at hand. The Internet is full of ideas on what to say and do at a funeral. The family of the deceased will truly appreciate that you were present at the service, and your words of comfort will mean much.

The funeral service is a time of closure, a time of mourning, the outpouring of grief and when you support these members, you are helping them to get on with their lives again.

What to Do Say and Wear at Funerals – Support to the family

In a lot of cultures, death usually calls for visitation or a wake. That is usually a courtesy call to the funeral home before the funeral. At this visitation or wake, the casket is either open or closed with flowers on display.

Here the family of the deceased will receive visitors who will offer condolences and words of support.

At the funeral service or memorial service, you might find it is a very public affair – many friends, family, colleagues and neighbours attending. There will usually be a eulogy; there will be prayers and other traditions and customers.

Sometimes the members of the family are particularly are terribly sad and then you need only greet the mourners and briefly offer your condolences. The family will appreciate your supporting presence. If the funeral is going to be a very private affair, then it is usually a case of attending by invitation only.

The burial will follow the funeral. At some funerals, there will be the deposit of a shovel of earth ceremoniously tossed into the grave. Usually, a member of the family will initiate this ceremony and then others will follow. Not all partake of this, but if you were very close to the deceased, you might also have a turn.

What to Do Say and Wear at Funerals – A Few Words can Speak Volumes

Usually after the burial, and in a lot of cultures, a meal will follow at a chosen venue. That symbolises the continuation of life and once again a rallying of friends and family in support. Here fond memories of the deceased might be recalled where some smiles and even laughter might follow, and this will be totally acceptable.

If you are at a total loss as to expressing your condolences, just saying that you are sorry to hear of the sad news is appropriate, or that the deceased will be so missed and how sorry you feel. Good etiquette is just showing genuine condolences and affection and then being aware as to the right moment to move away.

What to wear to a funeral

In our Western culture, we usual wear black, although this tradition is quickly changing. Wearing other colours is not a sign of disrespect. Just ensure the colours are not too wild, bright or patterned. Play it safe with the darker colours, and you won’t go wrong. Some religions that are stricter with the dress code and impose more rigorous standards and for these, you can always do an Internet search to ensure you follow the right etiquette.

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All info was correct at time of publishing